Things would've been so different...

Things would've been so different if I had stayed with you
If I had stayed in your arms and held unto you.
So many questions still remain; stuck inside my brain
hoping for some answers, searching for someone to explain
why you left me behind and never turned back
got on the right train but on the wrong track
are you the one to blame for all that I lack?
these are just questions, not meant to attack
your chararcter or lifestyle; I just want the facts
cause over the years the stories have gotten real wack
first they said you ran away, then they say you gave us up
said you'd give up all your rights, and you wouldn't look us up
a new life, a new house, maybe a new beginning
thought we was stretching, but you ain't return for the 8th inning
thought the move was temporary, thought it wouldn't last
always told myself she'd be back and I didn't have to ask
did she call? is she here yet? when will she come and get us?
my mommy loves all of us, she can never forget us.
but there I stood waiting and waiting all the time
bottled up emotions had me feeling like a mime
so I told myself she must be dead thats all that would've stopped her
me and my youngest got adopted but the oldest they didn't adopt her
And with that came the name change, and now I don't carry your surname
And I wonder if she's gotten married and possibly changed her name